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A CU tradition - Nebraska jokes - got any good uns
- Thread starter 77buff
- Start date
Kameltosis
Well-Known Member
looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
87toInfinity
Well-Known Member
Also, if your fiance wears this to your wedding, get the **** out. Now. She has most likely banged all your best men and the priest. Slut.
IDBUFF
Active Member
Also, if your fiance wears this to your wedding, get the **** out. Now. She has most likely banged all your best men and the priest. Slut.
If my fiance wore that to my wedding I would have died and gone to heaven.
Don't sweat it. Even if that wedding didn't take place in Phuckbraska I'm sure an event exactly like that happened there only at a Denny's or maybe even a place as fancy as an Applebee's. "My Wife/Cow wants extra cornbread and I need some mayonnaise for my french fries...The wedding was great. The wife says it was way better than her first three weddings....With the wife and her 6 kids moving in we just don't have enough room for brother Cooter and my cousin/uncle Jeb in the double wide anymore..."
BuffFan
Member
A typical CU homecoming parade! :smile2:
White shirt & red boa, looks like NU fans to me. :lol:
14ers4me
Member
What rapier wit. Will we ever recover from such a blast?
An ACTUAL Colorado wedding.....im not kidding
Could be from Colorado. We do have to share the place with CSU grads... :huh:
You know you're from *ebraska when the best comparison you have for fun is taking a ****... :smile2:
MrFrumpylane
Well-Known Member
Damn, Junc.. tried repping you but I have to "spread it around" first. Kudos. :thumbsup:
Great point. :thumbsup:
So, at the Big XII science fare a CU student, a Texas student, and a 'braska student were discussing their project.
UT Student: We are going to send a guy up into space and orbit the earth!
CU Student: Sorry to say teesip, but we've got you beet. We are going to send a guy to the moon and bring him back.
nu Student: You guys are lightweights. We are going to send a guy to the Sun!
CU Student: To the Sun? You idot, he'll burn up before he gets half way there!
nu Student: We thought about that, for sure. But we figured it out. We are going to send him at night!
UT Student: We are going to send a guy up into space and orbit the earth!
CU Student: Sorry to say teesip, but we've got you beet. We are going to send a guy to the moon and bring him back.
nu Student: You guys are lightweights. We are going to send a guy to the Sun!
CU Student: To the Sun? You idot, he'll burn up before he gets half way there!
nu Student: We thought about that, for sure. But we figured it out. We are going to send him at night!
phatmack
Active Member
A Knebraska couple was in bed on their wedding night and were about to
consummate their marriage. The wife stops the husband, saying, "Be gentle.
I'm still a virgin." The NU man is astounded. He has never been with a virgin
before. He decides to call his father for advice. "Dad," says the
newly-married redneck. "My new wife is a virgin! What do I do?"
"Better come on home, son," replies his father. "If she ain't good enough
for her own family, she sure ain't good enough for ours."
consummate their marriage. The wife stops the husband, saying, "Be gentle.
I'm still a virgin." The NU man is astounded. He has never been with a virgin
before. He decides to call his father for advice. "Dad," says the
newly-married redneck. "My new wife is a virgin! What do I do?"
"Better come on home, son," replies his father. "If she ain't good enough
for her own family, she sure ain't good enough for ours."
Marching Buff
Member
What's the difference between a porcupine and Memorial stadium?
A porcupine has 80,000 pricks on the outside.
A porcupine has 80,000 pricks on the outside.
Deleted member 807
Guest
Q: How is a colonoscopy different from the kNU Tunnel walk?
A: HuskerVision. Other than that, both are an examination of the aNUs using a camera to show polyps and other red ulcerations.
A: HuskerVision. Other than that, both are an examination of the aNUs using a camera to show polyps and other red ulcerations.
Blackshirts
Guest
Two sCUm fans were getting divorced. They were at a court hearing to decide who would get custody of their kid. After the judge came out of his chambers, he said, "After reviewing both of your cases, I have decided to grant custody to the mother."
The kid started whining and crying. The judge asked, "What's wrong?"
"My mother beats me," the kid said.
"Well, I guess I'll have to grant custody to the father then", the judge said.
The kid started whining and crying some more. The judge asked, "What's wrong now?"
The kid said, "My father beats me even more."
"Well, you don't want to live with your mother because she beats you and you don't want to live with your father because he beats you. Where do you want to live?" the judge asked.
"I wanna live with the Colorado Buffaloes, they don't beat anybody!"
The kid started whining and crying. The judge asked, "What's wrong?"
"My mother beats me," the kid said.
"Well, I guess I'll have to grant custody to the father then", the judge said.
The kid started whining and crying some more. The judge asked, "What's wrong now?"
The kid said, "My father beats me even more."
"Well, you don't want to live with your mother because she beats you and you don't want to live with your father because he beats you. Where do you want to live?" the judge asked.
"I wanna live with the Colorado Buffaloes, they don't beat anybody!"
Rraalph 3000
Well-Known Member
Except for when they play the Pinkshirts.....no jokes, just punchlines....**** THE HUSKERS
Kameltosis
Well-Known Member
ummmmm.....a punchline is part of a joke......
Blackshirts
Guest
It's just too indepth for some to understand I guess....
Deleted member 807
Guest
Separated at birth?
The Guest
Guest
Separated at birth?
I personally think the Bob's Big Boy would kick li'l red's ass!
Blackshirts
Guest
The Guest
Guest
I have been wondering about these two myself.......:thumbsup:
Reno kicks Hawk's ass. No question. Nothing to be ashamed of there.
The Guest
Guest
Anybody else notice that the punctuation is incorrect on Lil' (sic) Red's cap? The apostrophe is misplaced...unless he's all gangsta like lil' Kim...
Lil' Kim would kick lil' red's li'l misspelled ass!
Lil' Kim would kick lil' red's li'l misspelled ass!
Last edited by a moderator:
Kameltosis
Well-Known Member
I have been wondering about these two myself.......:thumbsup:
:rofl2::rofl2: Rep for you good sir!
Deleted member 807
Guest
Coaching Nebraska: That's a Dirty Job.
77buff
Well-Known Member
very good - even for a husker, but you forgot Hawkins is always cheering, about what - I don't know?I have been wondering about these two myself.......:thumbsup:
Kameltosis
Well-Known Member
Coaching Nebraska: That's a Dirty Job.
haha he does look like Mr. Rowe from Dirty Jobs! I love that show.
His first show ever was an Iowa Hog farm....brought back memories of weening pigs before my high school football games.
God, worst job ever.
Deleted member 807
Guest
Tommy Lee's favorite blow-up doll...Watch where you put that thumb, Lil'Red!
The Husker marching band is the classiest in the country with Tommy Lee in the line. Keep that right stick up, Tommy.
Tommy Lee respects a full sized cob.
Daddies across the Husker nation hope Tommy Lee is hepatitis free..
The Husker marching band is the classiest in the country with Tommy Lee in the line. Keep that right stick up, Tommy.
Tommy Lee respects a full sized cob.
Daddies across the Husker nation hope Tommy Lee is hepatitis free..