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A really sh*tty preview of the 2023 TCU game

Potty Mouth Poop GIF by Tailgating Challenge
 
Sorry, but that was definitely not a ****ty preview. Smelled much less foul than some of those so called professional sportswriters/columnists.

The only thing that may make it ****ty is due to all the extra money I gambled on the Buffs to win based on your perfect SPI analysis.
 
This one took a while to write and wasn't as fun for me as usual. With so many new and casual CU fans, I felt like I needed to give some foundation to what the diehards have suffered through. With almost everyone inside the football building being new this year, I felt like I needed to familiarize things.

First draft ended up being as dry as a book report and I didn't think this one was as funny as a lot of others. Usually, it's more of a blitzkrieg of writing that hits a certain pace and beat, has turned off all filters for being inappropriate, and goes completely over the top... and makes me laugh while I'm doing it. This one didn't.

Should be more normal next week, with extra hate from the norm probably. Debating on whether or not to give any history & context on why CU hates Nebraska and everyone else should too. Leaning not, but will probably mix in a bunch of the tropes.
 
This one took a while to write and wasn't as fun for me as usual. With so many new and casual CU fans, I felt like I needed to give some foundation to what the diehards have suffered through. With almost everyone inside the football building being new this year, I felt like I needed to familiarize things.

First draft ended up being as dry as a book report and I didn't think this one was as funny as a lot of others. Usually, it's more of a blitzkrieg of writing that hits a certain pace and beat, has turned off all filters for being inappropriate, and goes completely over the top... and makes me laugh while I'm doing it. This one didn't.

Should be more normal next week, with extra hate from the norm probably. Debating on whether or not to give any history & context on why CU hates Nebraska and everyone else should too. Leaning not, but will probably mix in a bunch of the tropes.

Stick with tennis and you will do just fine.
 
Looking forward to the annual tradition of Nik doing 2 of these then ****ing off for the rest of the season. ****ty!
There may be a reason I have burnt out during past seasons. I mean, it's damn difficult to bounce back from the middle of the night game at Hawaii with any motivation to run smack.
 
If you zoom in, they are all kind of (unsurprisingly) weird looking.

Get a nose job, dear. You'll be cute as a button.

Screenshot 2023-08-30 at 6.17.53 PM.png

It's a bit intense. Relax the eyes.

Screenshot 2023-08-30 at 6.18.23 PM.png

That's your hairdo? I know it distracts from your nose that curves to the right and your asymmetrical butt chin (we really need to do something about the droopy right half of your chin - it's so sad the way that it sinks) . It's almost as if the tip of your nose is pointing at the weird part your chin, and telling the world, "We're open for business!" Don't worry. We can fix that, precious.

Screenshot 2023-08-30 at 6.19.09 PM.png

Oh girl. I don't even know where to begin.

Screenshot 2023-08-30 at 6.19.55 PM.png
 
Last edited:
If you zoom in, they are all kind of (unsurprisingly) weird looking.

Get a nose job, dear. You'll be cute as a button.

View attachment 63810

It's a bit intense. Relax the eyes.

View attachment 63811

That's your hairdo? I know it distracts from your nose that curves to the left and your asymmetrical butt chin (we really need to do something about the droopy left half of your chin - it's so sad) .

View attachment 63812

Oh girl. I don't even know where to begin.

View attachment 63813
They should smile more, amirite
 
If you zoom in, they are all kind of (unsurprisingly) weird looking.

Get a nose job, dear. You'll be cute as a button.

View attachment 63810

It's a bit intense. Relax the eyes.

View attachment 63811

That's your hairdo? I know it distracts from your nose that curves to the left and your asymmetrical butt chin (we really need to do something about the droopy left half of your chin - it's so sad) .

View attachment 63812

Oh girl. I don't even know where to begin.

View attachment 63813
Hank's binge watching RuPaul's Drag Race again, guys. We're going to need to do another intervention.
 
@Hank gonna make us come over there sober and straight and help coach him into therapy. i am going to need 48 hours notice.
 
If you zoom in, they are all kind of (unsurprisingly) weird looking.

Get a nose job, dear. You'll be cute as a button.

View attachment 63810

It's a bit intense. Relax the eyes.

View attachment 63811

That's your hairdo? I know it distracts from your nose that curves to the right and your asymmetrical butt chin (we really need to do something about the droopy right half of your chin - it's so sad the way that it sinks) . It's almost as if the tip of your nose is pointing at the weird part your chin, and telling the world, "We're open for business!" Don't worry. We can fix that, precious.

View attachment 63812

Oh girl. I don't even know where to begin.

View attachment 63813
To the surprise of nobody… 1,1,1,1
 
If you zoom in, they are all kind of (unsurprisingly) weird looking.

Get a nose job, dear. You'll be cute as a button.

View attachment 63810

It's a bit intense. Relax the eyes.

View attachment 63811

That's your hairdo? I know it distracts from your nose that curves to the right and your asymmetrical butt chin (we really need to do something about the droopy right half of your chin - it's so sad the way that it sinks) . It's almost as if the tip of your nose is pointing at the weird part your chin, and telling the world, "We're open for business!" Don't worry. We can fix that, precious.

View attachment 63812

Oh girl. I don't even know where to begin.

View attachment 63813
 
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