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SI: CU Assistant Coach's Victim Seeks Justice
- Thread starter TDbuff
- Start date
It appears something snapped when he came to Boulder. Sounds like he was fine before that, unless some more skeletons come out of the closet.
I just went back and looked at his bio. He had never been west of Texas (mostly east of there) and this was the first adversity he had faced in his professional career. Everything was a promotion until he lost the DC role at CMU and accepted the LB position at CU. We proceeded to go 4-9 in his first season with the Buffs and he was working for what we know now was an egomaniac.
Some people just can't handle the roller coaster. Not sure if that was true of Joe, but it lines up.
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As a guy who has never been in an abusive relationship, I'll never understand what keeps people in these abusive relationships together. This was going on for 2 years and they weren't even living in the same state - she had to fly out to CO to see Tumpkin and it sounds like every time she did she was abused. From the outside it seems this would have been an easy relationship to get out of - I can't imagine what keeps these relationships together. It's a terrible and sad situation.
Probably distance since he started to cheat on her, but I believe she said this happened while she was at CMU as well.
Deleted member 807
Guest
Love is a battlefield.
- Pat Benatar
Sympathies to the victim. Sounds like a hellish relationship. May she be on the path to healing.
Shame on Joe for laying a violent hand on her so many times. The allegations in that article are infuriating.
- Pat Benatar
Sympathies to the victim. Sounds like a hellish relationship. May she be on the path to healing.
Shame on Joe for laying a violent hand on her so many times. The allegations in that article are infuriating.
According to the 9news report, the first time it happened was Feb 2015 when she came out here to visit him at a hotel.
Please just stop reading it.
phatel20
Active Member
cu3x
Well-Known Member
Not being sarcastic; it's called 'co-dependency'. Usually it is not just one person in the relationship who causes the drama - they both feed off it. It's arguable that often in life, people act out what was instilled in them at a very young age. Most abusive men grew up seeing dad treat mom like crap and learning women are really there to serve. It is very common for an abused woman to leave an abusive relationship and enter into another. As horrible as it sounds, many unconsciously seek out abusive men. It sux, but the brain is happiest when it keeps doing the same things over and over - without having to make tough decisions. If you are made to believe you are worthless and deserve to be beaten, it is very difficult to change that belief. (is it the Stockholm Syndrome' that explains why prisoners come to love and be devoted to their captors?) The woman in JT's case apparently was able to - unless this was just her way of hitting him hard.
This likely sounds like a load of crap, and I'm surprised I wrote it, exposing myself to allbuff ridicule, but it's close to what most experts believe.
DiggerBuffs
Well-Known Member
Again just ****ting on the victim. You are a dick. Nothing new there. Like you said Better to not say stupid **** like this blaming the victim.
I didn't take it that way. Understanding the psychology of abuse is important to understanding this. I think the wording might have been better, but I don't think that he was trying to blame the victim.
http://www.colorado.edu/today/2017/02/09/ad-statement-recent-handling-tumpkin-allegations
First and foremost, I want to acknowledge that I could have handled this situation better. I feel particularly bad that I did not personally reach out to the woman involved. I realize it would have been helpful for her to hear from me directly, letting her know the steps we would take and just checking in with her to offer personal help and support.
I also should have engaged our Office of Equity and Compliance right away. As the Chancellor stated last Friday, we will err on the side of caution by reporting when in doubt moving forward and should have done so here.
Additionally, I take responsibility for not being aware that a temporary restraining order had been filed prior to the day we received a copy, Jan. 6. Immediately after reviewing the report, we called Joe in and suspended him the same day. I understand this may appear to some that we were trying to hide the allegation. We were not. We hesitated to put Joe immediately on leave after we first learned of the allegation without any police investigation being brought to us or filings in a court. This does not change the situation, but gives you an idea of our conundrum. In the future, we will do better involving our experts around the campus immediately.
People need to know that I am committed to doing things the right way here. I am as thrilled by our football success as anyone, but I don’t ever want to compromise our values. I want us to be a model program in all ways and at all times. I am fully supportive of the changes the Chancellor is implementing and I am committed to upholding CU Boulder’s values in all our words and in actions.
Respectfully,
Rick George,
Athletics Director, University of Colorado
First and foremost, I want to acknowledge that I could have handled this situation better. I feel particularly bad that I did not personally reach out to the woman involved. I realize it would have been helpful for her to hear from me directly, letting her know the steps we would take and just checking in with her to offer personal help and support.
I also should have engaged our Office of Equity and Compliance right away. As the Chancellor stated last Friday, we will err on the side of caution by reporting when in doubt moving forward and should have done so here.
Additionally, I take responsibility for not being aware that a temporary restraining order had been filed prior to the day we received a copy, Jan. 6. Immediately after reviewing the report, we called Joe in and suspended him the same day. I understand this may appear to some that we were trying to hide the allegation. We were not. We hesitated to put Joe immediately on leave after we first learned of the allegation without any police investigation being brought to us or filings in a court. This does not change the situation, but gives you an idea of our conundrum. In the future, we will do better involving our experts around the campus immediately.
People need to know that I am committed to doing things the right way here. I am as thrilled by our football success as anyone, but I don’t ever want to compromise our values. I want us to be a model program in all ways and at all times. I am fully supportive of the changes the Chancellor is implementing and I am committed to upholding CU Boulder’s values in all our words and in actions.
Respectfully,
Rick George,
Athletics Director, University of Colorado
A statement from Coach MacIntyre
Published: Feb. 9, 2017
I write this to the CU community not only as a coach who has built his career on always trying to do the right thing both on and off the field but as a person who tries to be compassionate.
I understand the concerns of those who worry about the safety of women—as I do—and those concerned that success on the football field means we will abandon our ethics and morals. That is not who I am as a man, a coach, a teacher and as a member of the CU community.
I did not come to CU to run a program or to achieve success at any cost. Nor has the CU leadership ever encouraged such behavior. I can assure the campus community, all CU fans and all of our student-athletes and their families that I personally (and our team and coaching staff collectively) will continue to build the rise of CU football on a bedrock set of values: decency, honor, excellence, respect for women and for all people being chief among them.
Upon hearing the allegations by Joe Tumpkin’s girlfriend, my initial reaction and foremost concern was for her safety. I reiterated that to her several times and confirmed that she was in fact, safe.
In the same conversation, I was clear in communicating to her my obligation as a university employee to notify my superior, which is exactly what I did. I can say I did everything necessary to ensure this individual’s statements were relayed immediately.
I would like to clarify the following reported statements:
There were two separate conversations. The first was her report to me of the abuse. In the second conversation, I communicated to her that I reported it.
Tumpkin was made the play caller for the bowl game because, at the time of the decision, there was no police report or legal complaint. This decision was approved by my superiors.
I want to be clear I unequivocally endorse the chancellor’s plans for improving CU’s policies and practices in dealing with matters of domestic violence and pledge that I and the entire football coaching staff will work to carry out our obligations under university policy.
Thank you.
Mike MacIntyre,
Head Coach, University of Colorado
http://www.colorado.edu/today/2017/02/09/statement-coach-macintyre
Published: Feb. 9, 2017
I write this to the CU community not only as a coach who has built his career on always trying to do the right thing both on and off the field but as a person who tries to be compassionate.
I understand the concerns of those who worry about the safety of women—as I do—and those concerned that success on the football field means we will abandon our ethics and morals. That is not who I am as a man, a coach, a teacher and as a member of the CU community.
I did not come to CU to run a program or to achieve success at any cost. Nor has the CU leadership ever encouraged such behavior. I can assure the campus community, all CU fans and all of our student-athletes and their families that I personally (and our team and coaching staff collectively) will continue to build the rise of CU football on a bedrock set of values: decency, honor, excellence, respect for women and for all people being chief among them.
Upon hearing the allegations by Joe Tumpkin’s girlfriend, my initial reaction and foremost concern was for her safety. I reiterated that to her several times and confirmed that she was in fact, safe.
In the same conversation, I was clear in communicating to her my obligation as a university employee to notify my superior, which is exactly what I did. I can say I did everything necessary to ensure this individual’s statements were relayed immediately.
I would like to clarify the following reported statements:
There were two separate conversations. The first was her report to me of the abuse. In the second conversation, I communicated to her that I reported it.
Tumpkin was made the play caller for the bowl game because, at the time of the decision, there was no police report or legal complaint. This decision was approved by my superiors.
I want to be clear I unequivocally endorse the chancellor’s plans for improving CU’s policies and practices in dealing with matters of domestic violence and pledge that I and the entire football coaching staff will work to carry out our obligations under university policy.
Thank you.
Mike MacIntyre,
Head Coach, University of Colorado
http://www.colorado.edu/today/2017/02/09/statement-coach-macintyre
/thread
Chancellor's Corner: An update on our campus response to Tumpkin allegations
Published: Feb. 9, 2017
I am writing today to let you know our next steps related to the allegations of domestic violence against former CU assistant football coach Joe Tumpkin, and how those were responded to internally. Athletic Director Rick George and coach Mike MacIntyre also offer their responses to our plans and the situation itself.
You may recall that on Feb. 3, I wrote about the university’s response to issues covered in Sports Illustrated article. I apologized to the alleged victim on behalf of the university and on behalf of head coach Mike MacIntyre and CU Athletic Director Rick George. We regret that we did not involve our Office of Institutional Equity and Compliance (OIEC) as soon as any of us learned of the allegation and that we did not reach out appropriately to her.
I have met with Valerie Simons, executive director of OIEC, and we are stepping up our educational efforts and processes going forward to ensure that in the future all of our employees, including the three of us, know to report anything of this nature, even when it involves someone not affiliated with the campus. You can expect to see communications soon about increased opportunities to become familiar with university policy in this area and where to report.
Since the early 2000s, we have made some key structural changes to more closely align athletics to the campus and provide accountability. Just some of those changes were:
You have my promise that, moving ahead, our commitment to improving in these areas will be steadfast and unwavering.
Philip P. DiStefano,
Chancellor
http://www.colorado.edu/today/2017/...pdate-our-campus-response-tumpkin-allegations
Published: Feb. 9, 2017
I am writing today to let you know our next steps related to the allegations of domestic violence against former CU assistant football coach Joe Tumpkin, and how those were responded to internally. Athletic Director Rick George and coach Mike MacIntyre also offer their responses to our plans and the situation itself.
You may recall that on Feb. 3, I wrote about the university’s response to issues covered in Sports Illustrated article. I apologized to the alleged victim on behalf of the university and on behalf of head coach Mike MacIntyre and CU Athletic Director Rick George. We regret that we did not involve our Office of Institutional Equity and Compliance (OIEC) as soon as any of us learned of the allegation and that we did not reach out appropriately to her.
I have met with Valerie Simons, executive director of OIEC, and we are stepping up our educational efforts and processes going forward to ensure that in the future all of our employees, including the three of us, know to report anything of this nature, even when it involves someone not affiliated with the campus. You can expect to see communications soon about increased opportunities to become familiar with university policy in this area and where to report.
Since the early 2000s, we have made some key structural changes to more closely align athletics to the campus and provide accountability. Just some of those changes were:
- The finances of the athletics department and construction projects report on a dotted line to our Senior Vice Chancellor and CFO Kelly Fox for external review and oversight.
- We have placed an academic officer in athletics reporting directly to the provost to ensure that all academic offerings, credit and support are in line with our academic standards across the university.
- The senior fundraising officer for athletics reports to the head of Advancement on the campus to align the fundraising efforts across the campus.
- More recently, our office of Performance Improvement engaged with Rick George and his team to develop a full strategic plan, which includes metrics and accountability.
- First, we are designating Senior Associate Athletic Director for Internal Operations and Senior Women’s Administrator Ceal Barry as the direct liaison from athletics for all sports and operations, including football, to the head of OIEC.
- Second, I have also directed OIEC and athletics to develop a plan to strengthen the collaboration and education between OIEC and athletics to provide regular training and guidance to the athletic director and the entire athletics staff.
You have my promise that, moving ahead, our commitment to improving in these areas will be steadfast and unwavering.
Philip P. DiStefano,
Chancellor
http://www.colorado.edu/today/2017/...pdate-our-campus-response-tumpkin-allegations
nvm... hadn't seen it posted above
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vinniew_11
Well-Known Member
I am satisfied with all three statements.
Distef's is "ok". RG's (as usual) is the gold standard. MM's is very bad ("I followed policy", "I reported to my superiors", etc.).
In the article he comes off as a guy hiding behind his lawyer and in this statement he comes off as a guy hiding behind bureaucracy.
Notice that unlike Phil and RG, he fails to say that he regrets how things were handled or gives any examples of what could have been done better.
I wonder what MM's reaction would be to this statement from one of his players that had ****ed up.
I really, really like Mac, but this is so disappointing.
In the article he comes off as a guy hiding behind his lawyer and in this statement he comes off as a guy hiding behind bureaucracy.
Notice that unlike Phil and RG, he fails to say that he regrets how things were handled or gives any examples of what could have been done better.
I wonder what MM's reaction would be to this statement from one of his players that had ****ed up.
I really, really like Mac, but this is so disappointing.
Howell? Is that you?
No, no. More navel gazing. The people of words must have their audience while they preen and strut.
Good Lord.
Deleted member 807
Guest
A little strutting and preening in this thread affords the comfort of not being hypocritical about the cesspool in Waco that's being covered in the **** Baylor thread. It's a fair price to pay.
Handle it the best you can, admit mistakes, work to avoid those mistakes again in the future.
We should be proud of this. Not of what happened, but that the people involved genuinely wanted to do the right thing and admitted they goofed when they didn't. Stuff like this gets swept under a big rug at most schools.
Be proud, Buffs. The victim is being helped and our integrity is intact.
We should be proud of this. Not of what happened, but that the people involved genuinely wanted to do the right thing and admitted they goofed when they didn't. Stuff like this gets swept under a big rug at most schools.
Be proud, Buffs. The victim is being helped and our integrity is intact.
vinniew_11
Well-Known Member
Of course MMs statement comes off like that. He's a football coach and not a bureaucrat. He doesn't make policy changes so therefore wouldn't comment on policy issues. Both RG and DiSteph are trained and it's their job to look at policies and make appropriate changes.
ko_leos
Well-Known Member
This issue needs be recorded in the books, and everyone move on.
I am convinced there was no cover up. Instead, those at CU involved simply didn't know how to handle this. The statements issued show that they understand their mistakes and have the intent to do the right thing as quickly as possible in the future.
It does seem that MM comes off a bit defensive in his statement. However, under the circumstances, this is acceptable to me as a fan and alumni.
I am convinced there was no cover up. Instead, those at CU involved simply didn't know how to handle this. The statements issued show that they understand their mistakes and have the intent to do the right thing as quickly as possible in the future.
It does seem that MM comes off a bit defensive in his statement. However, under the circumstances, this is acceptable to me as a fan and alumni.
I felt RG and Mac needed to address this issue directly and am perfectly satisfied with the statements from all 3 of these guys. I appreciate that they explained their actions, acknowledged some possible missteps, and outlined changes they are making to avoid similar mistakes in the future. Not sure we could have asked for much more.
The contrast of these statements to the black hole in Waco is striking.
The contrast of these statements to the black hole in Waco is striking.
I give Mac the benefit of a doubt. I mean, there is still the potential for a law suit so I'd imagine he has to be careful.