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Life in Huskerland

Discussion in 'Colorado Football Message Board' started by Mb2658, Feb 13, 2013.

  1. Mb2658

    Mb2658 Well-Known Member

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    So today one of my coworkers came up to me and was visibly annoyed. I asked what his problem was and he proceeded to tell me that he had seen a vehicle with a Buffs sticker on one corner of the bumper and a sticker depicting Calvin from Calvin and Hobbs pissing on an N on the other corner. I laughed, told him how awesome I thought that it was. He responded that he would never do that because it is disrespectful. He then went on a tirade about how disrespectful and rude Buffs fans are. I laughed again and explained to him that when you are a blindly devoted Husker fan, you cannot fathom how someone might not like the Huskers and would actually root for some other team. I likened Nebraska to a cult and offered to get him some help to escape from said cult.
     
  2. Burrito Palazzo

    Burrito Palazzo huff my smug Club Member

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    Did you explain piss balloons to him? Rep for the story.
     
  3. Mb2658

    Mb2658 Well-Known Member

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    Nah, it would have taken too long. He tried to make some lame argument about how most Nebraska fans went to the University. (The University of Nebraska at Lincoln, as the rest of the world calls it.) I just started laughing and I think even he realized how stupid his statement was.
     
  4. Burrito Palazzo

    Burrito Palazzo huff my smug Club Member

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    Did you ask him about Estes Park?
     
  5. Mb2658

    Mb2658 Well-Known Member

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    He is going there on his Honeymoon. Go figure. He was almost as pissed off this week as he was last week when I showed him the video of the kid crying on ABC.
     
    Buffnik likes this.
  6. Ruckus

    Ruckus Peep my words. Club Member

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    You should be like, "Bro, better to be pissed off than pissed ON! Like that sticker! Remember? From the car!?"

    Then slap his ass, spit on his tits, and slash his tires. This is the word of Rugged.
     
  7. lvbuff

    lvbuff Well-Known Member

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    then you should **** his girlfriend...
     
  8. Ruckus

    Ruckus Peep my words. Club Member

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    Getting her naked and begging for dick, then refusing to **** her because of how ugly she is would be more insulting. And then you don't have to **** her, which is good because she's obviously going to be ugly. However, none of this is necessary, so I chose not to put it in my plan.

    You really think I haven't thought everything through? I'm a ****ing expert. You've been around here long enough. You should know.
     
  9. Uncle Ken

    Uncle Ken Orr no morr Club Member

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    That's a really well thought out plan (a surprise to nobody who has been around here for a while). You seem to have covered every angle as well as several contingencies.
     
  10. tante

    tante Club Member Club Member

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    or you could **** her and give her aids.
     
  11. Hugegroove

    Hugegroove Club Member Club Member

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    One of two things will happen. Either he'll get over it, or he won't. Hopefully not.
     
  12. Uncle Ken

    Uncle Ken Orr no morr Club Member

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    I think if I saw a bumpersticker of Calvin pissing on Ralphie, I'd piss on the sticker.

    Seriously, the whole Calvin pissing series is a complete redneck thing. I'm surprised it just didn't make the dude feel homesick.
     
  13. 4DemBuffs

    4DemBuffs Most admired poster Club Member

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    What if she is that porn chick? Midwest Mandy or something like that?
     
  14. Darth Snow

    Darth Snow Hawaiian Buffalo Club Member Junta Member

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    Rugged wants to get fat chicks naked. Fact.
     
  15. Burrito Palazzo

    Burrito Palazzo huff my smug Club Member

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    Undercover husker?

    Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I317 using Tapatalk 2
     
  16. BuffHerd

    BuffHerd Club Member Club Member

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  17. 77buff

    77buff Well-Known Member

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    husker_tat.jpg
     
  18. BuffHerd

    BuffHerd Club Member Club Member

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  19. Mb2658

    Mb2658 Well-Known Member

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    There is a Nebraska bred porn star who lives nearby. Her name is Jami Kenney and she makes Melissa Midwest or whatever the hell her name is look like Eve. I have dubbed her the "Pornhusker." Look her up but be forewarned, it's skank porn and not in a good way.
     
  20. tante

    tante Club Member Club Member

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    yikes:

    [​IMG]
     
  21. 4DemBuffs

    4DemBuffs Most admired poster Club Member

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    Huh... I was expecting this thread to be filled with that Nebraska porn star slut by now. Instead, we have this guy.

    Thanks for the let down guys. :smile2:
     
  22. Junction

    Junction Moderator Club Member

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    A well thought out plan, except for overlooking the fact that sheep really can't beg for dick, since they can't talk.

    But yeah, other than that he seems to have covered the major issues...
     
  23. Burrito Palazzo

    Burrito Palazzo huff my smug Club Member

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    Jamie Kennedy is the most!

    Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I317 using Tapatalk 2
     
  24. Buffnik

    Buffnik Real name isn't Nik Club Member Junta Member

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    Just because...

    [video=youtube;TjjEMkNomRc]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjjEMkNomRc[/video]
     
  25. Mb2658

    Mb2658 Well-Known Member

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    Oh Omaha is like Paris compared to Western Nebraska.

    Here is the local news station trying to get in on the Harlem Shake phenomenon.
    [video]http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eLKocXZOA24[/video]

    And here is the Freeones page for the Pornhusker for those of you who are too lazy to look it up. NSFW
    http://www.freeones.com/html/j_links/Jami_Kenney/
     
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2013
  26. The Ogre

    The Ogre Club Member Club Member

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    I have a sad story to share. My stepdaughter is a good trakster, and was offered by lots of mid-range schools - she chose NubKearney becuase of their unexpectedly good graphic arts program. Ended up dating some meathead, and moving to stincoln. He berates her for being from Colorado and prays at the alter of the corn, what sucks the most is that she's been so brainwashed by the braindead that she had the nerve to give me sh*t about my CU loyalty while visiting last week. All I can figure is that the water/air/food is horribly polluted, so if you go, take your own supplies.

    ...and yeah, Omaha's cute for the first hour or so, if you really hit the right places.
     
  27. Mb2658

    Mb2658 Well-Known Member

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    My condolences. I hope that it gives you some comfort that there are people like me who are forced to live here yet fight the good fight against the cult of the Huskers. I ran into a guy last week who was wearing a Buffs sweatshirt. I told him that it was nice to see a friendly face in enemy territory.
     
  28. BuffSurveyor

    BuffSurveyor Club Member Club Member

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    Ah, the guy was just screwing with you!
     
  29. The Ogre

    The Ogre Club Member Club Member

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    I get it, I lived there for work once, but it was in the mid 90's when it was easier to be a CU fan. Do they have running water where you are?
     
  30. ElCunado

    ElCunado Club Member Club Member

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    I need some clarification. Do you work at Chuck E Cheese's?
     

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