CitizenKane
Well-Known Member
For those of you that don’t know, and really I mean everyone who isn’t from Louisiana, ULM sits on the Bayou Desiard River east of Shreveport Louisiana and west of Jackson Mississippi along highway 20. Yes, this does mean it is smack dab in the middle of nowhere. But don’t think this means they can’t play hoops. After all, they beat a bunch of centenarians who could still dribble while using their walkers and they were within 6 points of Texas with 14 minutes to go in the game (Plus they were 21-10 last year). Here is a bit of information about some of their players.
Marvin ‘the confused Franco-Cajun’ Jean-Pierre - Despite his Cajun sounding name he clearly isn’t Cajun as he appears to have all his teeth. He also seems a bit confused as he found it necessary to inform everyone he is Str8 in his twitter handle (Doth protest too much?). Someone really needs to tell this poor confused soul, that it is ok if he is Str8 or if he isn’t. 13 is his lucky number and he will be attempting to hit that point total for the third game in a row.
“I ain’t” Jordon, Harris – His parents named him after the greatest of all time…and he insists on wearing the same number, and even scored 23 points against the centenarians…but his play against Texas and his nick name is all we need to know.
Nick “Francis Ford” Coppola – Now that this movie making days are done and he has given up on ever making a good bottle of wine Mr. Coppola has moved down south, shaved his beard and is quite possibly the second best player on the ULM roster.
Sam “Evil headband” Alabakis – Gave up a less than lucrative career in the Aussie vs Roo grecko roman wrestling league to join the ULM basketball team and spread the cult of bad headbands. This 6’11” Aussie has been known to force opposing players away from rebounds using only his sharply pointed adams apple.
Sam ‘Morph’ McDaniel – Another Aussie who somehow found his way to the middle of nowhere Louisiana….Maybe we shouldn’t be surprised, I mean whose ever heard of Morphett Valle Australia? Thanks to their excellent academic programs ULM has seen fit to morph two words into one and lists his home town as Morphettvale. He also loves the number 13 and averaged 13 pts per game last season.
Travis “Chapstick” Munnings – This rabid Bahamian wears #1 on his jersey and is the number one guy CU must keep off the boards. Even though he is only 6’6” tall he had 13 rebounds against the Centenarians (No they can’t jump with their walkers) and 10 against Texas. Oh and no, I can’t explain why someone from the Bahamas would decide to end up in northern Louisiana....maybe they abducted him?
Marvin ‘the confused Franco-Cajun’ Jean-Pierre - Despite his Cajun sounding name he clearly isn’t Cajun as he appears to have all his teeth. He also seems a bit confused as he found it necessary to inform everyone he is Str8 in his twitter handle (Doth protest too much?). Someone really needs to tell this poor confused soul, that it is ok if he is Str8 or if he isn’t. 13 is his lucky number and he will be attempting to hit that point total for the third game in a row.
“I ain’t” Jordon, Harris – His parents named him after the greatest of all time…and he insists on wearing the same number, and even scored 23 points against the centenarians…but his play against Texas and his nick name is all we need to know.
Nick “Francis Ford” Coppola – Now that this movie making days are done and he has given up on ever making a good bottle of wine Mr. Coppola has moved down south, shaved his beard and is quite possibly the second best player on the ULM roster.
Sam “Evil headband” Alabakis – Gave up a less than lucrative career in the Aussie vs Roo grecko roman wrestling league to join the ULM basketball team and spread the cult of bad headbands. This 6’11” Aussie has been known to force opposing players away from rebounds using only his sharply pointed adams apple.
Sam ‘Morph’ McDaniel – Another Aussie who somehow found his way to the middle of nowhere Louisiana….Maybe we shouldn’t be surprised, I mean whose ever heard of Morphett Valle Australia? Thanks to their excellent academic programs ULM has seen fit to morph two words into one and lists his home town as Morphettvale. He also loves the number 13 and averaged 13 pts per game last season.
Travis “Chapstick” Munnings – This rabid Bahamian wears #1 on his jersey and is the number one guy CU must keep off the boards. Even though he is only 6’6” tall he had 13 rebounds against the Centenarians (No they can’t jump with their walkers) and 10 against Texas. Oh and no, I can’t explain why someone from the Bahamas would decide to end up in northern Louisiana....maybe they abducted him?
